Season Three George Episode Guide

The Note 9/18/91 George, Jerry, and Elaine get notes from a dentist friend in order to have their insurance pay for their massages. George thinks IT moved when he got his massage. Kramer claims to have seen Joe DiMagio at Dinky Donuts. "He dunked!"

The Truth 9/25/91 George's girlfriend, Patrice, agrees to help Jerry with his tax audit since she is an accountant and used to work for the IRS. But George blows it when he tells her she's pretentious, which sends her to Woodhaven (a mental institution). We also find out that George's middle name is Louis and that Elaine thinks he's very cheap.

The Pen 10/2/91 Jerry and Elaine visit Jerry's parents in Florida and end up sleeping on a bad sofa bed. Jerry causes a stir when he accepts an astronaut pen from Jack Klompus, Morty Seinfeld's neighbour.

The Dog 10/9/91 George goes with Elaine to a movie, without Jerry--for the first time ever. They were going to see "Prognosis Negative" and when Jerry can't go because he is watching some drunk's dog, they decide to see "Ponce deLeon", but it's sold out and George and Elaine spend time together at Monk's. It's uncomfortable, until they start making fun of Jerry.

The Library 10/16/91 Jerry is hounded by a library policeman to return "Tropic of Capricorn" - overdue since 1971. Jerry calls on his girlfriend at the time to prove that he did return the book but ends up remembering that he had given the book to George. George runs into the gym teacher that caused him to lose the book by giving him a wedgie. Kramer entices the spinster librarian. This has some of the best dialog for a one time character.

The Parking Garage 10/30/91 George is supposed to meet his parents outside his apartment at 6:15 for their anniversary dinner and a broadway show. The gang begins the episode in a parking garage at 5 pm, looking for Kramer's car. We learn that George is afraid to carry a pen since he thinks he'll puncture his scrotum. He and Jerry are both arrested for peeing in the parking garage. Moreover, he nearly spits on a Mercedes for taking up two spaces. And his opening line to a new woman, Michelle, is a question: would she mind taking them around the garage to find the car. It works! But what we don't hear is the comment that gets them thrown out: something to do with L. Ron Hubbard. The episode ends at 7:45, with Kramer returning to the car with his air conditioner (hidden at purple 23).

The Cafe 11/6/91 Jerry befriends Baboo, an immigrant restaurant owner that never has any customers. Elaine takes an IQ test for George but ends up doing bad. They get caught cheating when they try it a second time.

The Tape 11/13/91 George's contribution to Jerry's routine: the captain of the toes and the coup de toe gets no response. He also hears of a Chinese cure for baldness (Dr. Zeng Xiao of the Hair Restoration Clinic) on tv and decides to call China to order it. But no one speaks English, so he gets Ping to order for him. Elaine also spills her secret: she was the voice on Jerry's tape. He instantly falls for her.

The Nose Job 11/20/91 George blows a job interview when he later realizes that he has spinach on his teeth. But he still has a good girlfriend--Audrey, who has a huge nose. Kramer tells her she needs a nose job, and George reluctanly approves of the idea because even Peter Jennings had one! But the job goes wrong and Audrey is butchered and George passes out. Audrey later dumps him for Kramer.

The Stranded 11/27/91 George gets short changed at the drug store and vows revenge. Jerry and Elaine go to a party on Long Island with George but get stuck there when George takes a women home. The party host stops by Jerry's apartment to kill some time but Jerry has to leave. George tries to steal and gets arrested. Jerry returns home to find that the host has had a call girl there and then Jerry gets arrested for solicitation.

The Alternate Side 12/4/91 George takes over parking the cars for Jerry's building. He freaks out with a car alarm and an overheating car. He also causes an accident with an ambulance. He crashes Jerry's rental, a blue Ford Escort and causes $2866 in damage.

The Red Dot 12/11/91 Elaine gets George a job so he buys her a cashmere sweater with a slight flaw. Jerry accidentally gives Elaine's boyfriend a drink not knowing he is an alcoholic. George has sex with the cleaning lady and gives her the sweater to shut her up.

The Subway 1/8/92 Everyone has an adventure on the subway. Elaine gets stuck and misses a lesbian wedding. Kramer gets a tip on a horse and then almost gets robbed of his winnings. George meets a beautiful woman and the she robs him at her hotel room. Jerry meets a naked man and goes to Coney Island with him.

The Pez Dispenser 1/15/92 Jerry makes Elaine laugh at George's girlfriend's piano recital. George gets "hand" by breaking up with her before she could break up with him. Kramer invents "The Beach". The comedy gang holds an intervention for a friend on drugs.

The Suicide 1/29/92 Jerry dates his neighbor's girlfriend when he goes into a coma. George lets Kramer go on his dream vacation because a psychic starts to warn him about something bad. Elaine breaks her fast by eating Newman's Dreggs Coffee Cake. George mentions having a brother.

The Fix-up 2/5/92 Elaine and Jerry fix-up George and a friend by describing their best features. Kramer gives George a condom that ends up being bad and George thinks he gets the girl pregnant. The New Friend:

The Boyfriend (Part 1), Of Mastodons and Men (Part 2) 2/12/92 George is called a "chucker" after a game of basketball with Jerry and Kramer. There, Jerry and George meet Keith Hernandez, whom we learn is a civil war buff. George would also like to be a civil war buff. He's also been on unemployment and has two weeks to find a job. He tells his caseworker, Lenore Sokol, that he's close with Vandelay Industries, which manufacturers latex. He is going to be a latex salesman, but he gives out Jerry's number (KL5-8383) for Vandelay Industries; but Kramer blows it when they call to check up.

The Limo 2/26/92 George and Jerry decide to pose as O'brien at the airport to get his limo ride. George plays the part of O'Brien and Jerry is Murphy. Once in the limo, they discover that they are going to Madison Square Garden and have four passes. They think that they have tickets to the Knicks and Bulls. Later, they discover that O'brien is the author of "The Game" and is head of the Aryan Union. Oops.

The Good Samaritan 3/4/92 Jerry witnesses a hit and run but when he goes to confront the woman he winds up dating her. Kramer has a seizure whenever he hears Mary Hart's voice. Jerry tries to tell the hit and run victim what happened but she end up thinking he did it.

The Letter 3/25/92 George can't stand button fly jeans because it takes too long. Jerry's girlfriend gets Yankee tickets from her father, who is the accountant for the team. One of George's dreams has come true--front row at Yankee Stadium behind the dugout. Elaine blows it when she wears an Oriole cap to the game and they are thrown out, but not before Kramer is hit in the head with a foul ball. George ends up buying $500 worth of art from Jerry's girlfriend--Kramer sneezes on it.

The Parking Space 4/22/92 On the way back from a flea market in West Chester, George reveals he has a brother and that he can't pay for parking. His plan for parking: start at the dream spot and then expand in concentric circles. He finds a spot in front of Jerry's building and starts a whole debate on parking: back in or front first?

The Keys 5/6/92 Kramer is using Jerry's apartment too much so Jerry takes his keys back. Kramer then takes his keys and gives them to George. George takes his keys from Elaine to give to Jerry but doesn't give Jerry Elaine's keys. Kramer decides to pursue his acting bug in Los Angeles.